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View Full Version : Okay, it's been a while but... (semi-vent)



kendermom
02-03-2009, 12:53 PM
I've been lurking... and dealing with 2 kids under 3, and The man going to the Army.

So I'm absolutely outta my mind lonely, not functioning, etc. I found a support board for military so's, but they're so *different*...

Anyway, something went down here last night that has me so pissed that after a night's sleep, I'm still so annoyed I'm on the verge of tears. I really don't know how to handle this person or their crap. The roomie decided at 7:30 last night to have the oldest child take everything off the banister upstairs and 'put it away'. She's 9. And autistic.

So when I went upstairs to get ready to go to bed, the linen closet was open because she had stuffed it full of things that were going to go to charity the next time they make a pick-up. Great. So now I have to clean out the damn closet. AGAIN.

I go into my room and find all the things that were hanging up in the laundry room are on my bed?! 3/4 of it isn't even mine. And I know that he handed those off to her. My bed is covered in folded stuff too; if I would've had a place for that stuff, it would've been put away yesterday afternoon.

And this morning when I went to do the morning wash, his things are in the washer, and all my delicates are in the dryer. Fantastic. Can't talk to D about it, he's in Oklahoma for remedial boot, can't talk to really anyone, because the roomie's on the phone more than a teenager, and most people that I talk to are mutual friends. GAH! Hate this...... GRRRRRRRRRRR

Lady Laurel
02-03-2009, 12:56 PM
All I can say is "hugs" I am not sure what I would do but sit the roomie down and have a very long talk...

Torra
02-03-2009, 01:45 PM
If it's affecting you that much, I'd say that you and the roomie need to have a talk about what is and is not acceptable behavior for both of you. Maybe schedule meetings so you have communication that's a routine about what's working, what needs work, and any other odds and ends that happen in the course of life.

Bronya
02-03-2009, 04:17 PM
Sorry sweets....that is always a headache for you. I so wish you could get out! At least I have this for you ::bighug::

Black Delia
02-03-2009, 05:23 PM
17 years ago and more, my own hubby was a navy man and out more to sea than on shore. Then he got out and we lead a pretty normal life (from other people's perspectives) for around 15 years.

With the employment market as it has been since around the beginning of 2005, he finally took the plunge and now drives semi's over the road for a living... he 'might' be home one day a week (thats if I'm lucky and he is sometimes away for two or three weeks at a time). A LOT of things go undone if I don't do them for myself.

Thank HEAVENS I don't have 2-legged children to make the situation even harder (any more. I did when he was in the navy), the four-legged and finned variety of "needy little ones" is hard enough, the blessing there is that they can't back-talk me (though there are times they 'do' try).

My best and only advise is get a secret hobby. MAKE yourself take an hour a day to decompress, dear. Its the only way to keep things sane and to continue to feel like you have your own identity and aren't just an extension of other people. ESPECIALLY because you have a child with special needs. Mine had the need for a bit of extra care, I can't imagine how much harder it is on you and how much stronger you must be because of it.

I've always believed that the higher and unseen powers (who, or whatever it is that you believe in), never give us more than we can truly handle. How very special you must be... for those higher powers to have entrusted you with a soul as special as a little one that have the need for 'more' than a normal mother must give!

As for your roommate. They are an adult.. remind them of that. Nicely, but make your point.

Bevin
02-03-2009, 06:33 PM
How very special you must be... for those higher powers to have entrusted you with a soul as special as a little one that have the need for 'more' than a normal mother must give!


Ummm...I am not any less special because I am a "normal" mother. I'm sure there are many others who would agree with me.

FairieTink
02-03-2009, 06:46 PM
Ummm...I am not any less special because I am a "normal" mother. I'm sure there are many others who would agree with me.

I don't think she meant you were, but until you have a special needs child you have no idea :zen: I have one of each and everyday is a new challange with my daughter. No I am not better than you because of it, but it is way different.

kendermom
02-04-2009, 12:57 AM
It is different... We're so strictly scheduled here. So much changes with that diagnosis...