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View Full Version : What Pornos Would Have Us Belive (NSFW!!!)


Adriana Rose
02-14-2006, 11:13 PM
I got this from a guy friend, it's too funny not to share!




What pornos would have us believe:
1. Women wear high heels to bed
2. men are never impotent
3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory
4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange guy she will not scream w/
embarrassment but insist he have sex w/ her
5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face w/ sperm
6. Women enjoy having sex w/ ugly middle-aged men
7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blow job
8. Women always cum when men do
9. A blow job will always get a woman off a speeding ticket
10. All women are noisy lays
11. People in the 70s couldnt screw unless there was a wild guitar solo in the
background
12. Those tits are real
13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice is for a man to take his half erect
penis and slap it repeatedly across a womens butt
14. Men always groan Oh Yeah when they cum
15. If there are two of them they high five each other and the girl isnt
disgusted
16. Double penetration makes a woman smile
17. Asian men dont exist
18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, he
wont bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his
girlfriends mouth
19. Theres a plot
20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite her by giving her
a gentle slap on the butt
21. nurses suck patients cocks
22. men always pull out
23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend shell be
only momentarily pissed off before fucking both of you
24. Women never have headaches...or periods
25. When a woman is sucking a mans cock its important for him to remind her to
suck it
26. Assholes are clean
27. A man ejaculating on a womans butt is a satisfying result for all parties
involved
28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a mans trousers and
find a cock there
29. Men dont have to beg
30. When standing during a blow job, the man will always place one hand on
back of the womans head and the other proudly on his hip.

Peaches O Malley
02-14-2006, 11:21 PM
Lmfao!!!! Plot? We don't need no stinking plot!!
That was hilarious!!! Thanks, I'm passing that on to my female friends. :haloslip:

Pathos
02-14-2006, 11:29 PM
1. Women wear high heels to bed Bed? When does being in bed enter into it?

Sometimes the action takes place on a bed but you're never in bed.

:yum:

jewelryman
02-14-2006, 11:37 PM
that is too funny.

Peaches O Malley
02-14-2006, 11:48 PM
Bed? When does being in bed enter into it?

Sometimes the action takes place on a bed but you're never in bed.

:yum:


The high heels are for traction. ;-)

Lady Sarah
02-15-2006, 08:23 AM
The high heels are for traction. ;-)

Among other things... ::wicked::

FairieTink
02-15-2006, 09:38 AM
HOly crap I love that.

Mistress Morigianna
02-15-2006, 01:21 PM
don't forget all workers (espically at the libary) wear sexy lingerie under thier clothes.

noone ever wears panyhose anymore

and coyboys magickly can take thier pants off while leaving thier boots and chaps

RichardMacHugely
02-15-2006, 08:41 PM
Hey, all of that stuff sounds about right to me.