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Rhonda_Melones
08-18-2006, 08:19 AM
This was passed down to me via myspace. I'm sorry but I just can't stop laughing! This is just too damned funny to me:snarf:

http://larknews.com/may_2004/secondary.php?page=2

Kidney donor cries foul when recipient ditches Christianity

TUPELO — Aleta Smith, who donated her kidney to a 20-year-old college student last year, wants it back now that the student has changed religions.

Smith, a self-described "on-fire Christian," gave her kidney to Hannah Felks, a Lutheran and regular Christian camp counselor, last year after seeing Felks on the local news.

"She was going to die unless she got a kidney," Smith says, sitting on the porch at her home. "They portrayed her as this nice Christian girl who works with kids. I saw it as a great opportunity to help a sister in the Lord."

The surgery grabbed headlines and Smith was lauded for her selflessness. But shortly after the surgery, Felks embarked on a "spiritual journey" to try out other religions, and settled on a blend of Pagan and Hindu beliefs.
"I wanted to get away from the belief system I was raised in and find the truth for myself," she says. She took a semester off to travel the world visiting spiritualists on three continents.

Smith was aghast when she heard of the conversion, and she quickly wrote a letter asking Felks to re-convert to Christianity or return the organ, saying it was donated under false pretenses.
"I feel helpless," she says. "Part of my body, my DNA, is stuck inside a person who's going to hell."

Smith suffers nightmares of her former organ filtering "strange Asian teas, pig blood and witch doctor brews in Africa," she says. She wonders if the Lord really wanted her to donate the kidney, or if she acted on a "triple-espresso high" she had that morning. She is also concerned that when her body is resurrected, it might be incomplete.

Felks frets that Smith is an "Indian giver," and says religious affiliation was never an issue.
"The kidney's working fine," Felks said by phone from Thailand. "I feel bad for Aleta. She did something wonderful for me, but that doesn't mean she gets to control my life."

In the meantime, Smith has alerted several dozen prayer chains, and her women's Bible study group is praying 12 hours a day for the re-conversion of Felks — and Smith's former kidney.
"I'm all for spiritual curiosity," she says, "but you've got to settle these things beforehand. My kidney belongs to Christ. It will never be Pagan."

Magdalene
08-18-2006, 08:31 AM
Surely this has got to be a joke, like in "The Onion"......

Torra
08-18-2006, 09:24 AM
I hope it's a joke...but I've met people like this. So I can see it either wat. Here's the rub: if her kidney belongs to Christ, well and good. But by her own theology there are 2 points against her. That "free will" issue and the fact that God made all his children, so techinically her kidney still belongs to Christ, it's just in transit. Assuming the notion of God wanting to own organs is valid in any case, which to me seems a bit preposterous.

Lady Sarah
08-18-2006, 09:33 AM
well, Christ on a Cracker...

Dear Christian Zealot,

I'm sorry, but you did a good deed for someone else. I'm guessing you wouldn't have donated your kidney to a child who really needed it, but turned out to be Muslim/Bhuddist/Jewish would you? Never mind that the good deed itself is seen in God's eyes. Never mind that you have NO say in what the recipient does with their life after you've given them your organ.

No love,
Moi.

ps - It's a kidney, a fucking piece of inanimate meat. Get a grip, it doesn't have a religion. It cannot HAVE a religion in the same vein that animals do not have religion and do not go to heaven. Your SPIRIT goes to heaven, the worms get the left overs.

Vixynne Rose
08-18-2006, 09:53 AM
::seconds everything Sarah just said::

Oh, and this lady needs to do some reading. The recipient of her kidney has "settled on a blend of Pagan and Hindu" beliefs, and the donor's having nightmares about her kidney filtering strange Asian teas and pig blood.
F.
F.
S.

Okay, first of all, tea is known as camellia sinensis. Annnnnnnd: Camellia sinensis is native to mainland South and Southeast Asia. Yes, it's now cultivated all over the durn place, but it ORIGINATED in Asia. So pretty much ALL tea is "strange Asian" tea.

Next point of ignorance: A practicing Hindu would NEVERRRR drink pig's blood. From Wikipedia: "Orthodox Hindus abstain from consuming anything gained at the expense of an animal's suffering," which would, I assume, preclude the drinking of blood...since few animals could be said to give that willingly.

:roll: My eyeballs are sore from rolling 'em at this woman and her "on fire" Christianity. Maybe the kidney's recipient could work up a bit of Pagan/Hindu urine to throw on her to put her out.

I just have NO patience for this kind of thing...

Lady Sarah
08-18-2006, 10:02 AM
I posted the article and link on another site...

and this popped up in the thread a few posts down:

http://larknews.com/may_2004/content.php?header=header&page=../disclaimer


DISCLAIMER

LarkNews® is a satirical newspaper published by Joel Kilpatrick.
LarkNews uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases when public
figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and
coincidental.

The content of this web-site is Copyright 2003 by Joel Kilpatrick, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted
in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher.

LarkNews is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. •

Selena
08-18-2006, 01:16 PM
http://larknews.com/may_2004/content.php?header=header&page=../disclaimer

Thanks for posting that this is a satirical site, but sadly, I fear this is not far off the mark for some of these zealots. I can see this happening.

Cyranno DeBoberac
08-18-2006, 01:51 PM
I knew the story had to be false because there was no mention of a lawsuit. :wink:

Rosina Cernak
08-18-2006, 02:16 PM
thank goodness this wasnt really true but you all know there are people out there that are like this.....

Rhonda_Melones
08-18-2006, 02:37 PM
That's the thing people are so off the wall today that I wouldn't put it past anyone to feel the way the lady in the story did. Check out the other stories they have on the site, it straddles the line of completely off the wall and yet believable:-P

daBaroness
08-18-2006, 11:34 PM
Sounds like your average, run-of-the-mill rural Kansan to me.

Ysobelle
08-19-2006, 12:29 AM
Sounds like your average, run-of-the-mill rural Kansan to me.


BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!


Worst part about this story? Six or seven years ago, we all would have laughed. Now we're so numbed by rampant stupidity it seems plausible.

Torra
08-19-2006, 06:18 AM
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!


Worst part about this story? Six or seven years ago, we all would have laughed. Now we're so numbed by rampant stupidity it seems plausible.

Sad but true. The bigger the village, the more idiots you've got to keep an eye on, I suppose. But that leads to some people becoming jaded. Me, I am so jaded about this kind of thing that I'm practically a statue from ancient China.