Eve Ensler's New Monologue

[Isabelle Warwicke]

I. am. speechess.

The Author of the Vagina Monologues (http://www.amazon.com/Vagina-Monologues-V-Day-Eve-Ensler/dp/0375505652) and activist who is the Artistic Driector of V-Day (http://newsite.vday.org/about) has produced a new book, I am an Emotional Creature, the Secret Life of Girls Around the World.

This piece (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-Tiad_JQCw) is one of her performances from it. I was fine up until 5:55. It is extremely powerful.

[Bux]

I had the opportunity to see VM in Detroit several years ago. I went with my mother, sister, a childhood friend and her mother.

Profound...joy...rage...humility...sadness. It was quite an afternoon.

It gave me (and I'm sure every woman there) time to reflect on my own Vagina Monologue..

I am sitting here in the audience watching three women deliver stories about other women who have so bravely discussed their vagina. There were stories of ignorance, pleasure, joy, devastation, confusion, and spiritual healing. Women of all races, economic backgrounds and ages. I can relate to all of them

I am sitting here in the audience with tears in my eyes and a secret. It's a secret I cannot tell.. not here.. not now, but soon.

See, my daughter is with my husband at home right now, so I can go out for some 'girl' time. My dear daughter that I delivered just 2 1/2 years ago. She is so precious, such a gift. There were two before her that were never to be. The loss of those two before she came into my life just broke my heart.. so I thought.

When my daughter was born my mother was there. So excited. So thrilled. She will be the first grandchild for her. She saw her emerge.. watched her take her first breath...stood next to her when she took her first bath. So many firsts from HER first born child.

Soon after my daughter was born I found out I was pregnant again. My husband and I were overjoyed, but scared. Wanting to share the news, but cautious. We heard the heartbeat, our emotions soared, we shared the news. At ten weeks there was no longer a heartbeat. Another loss. This one so painful. To have to un-tell the news to everyone. Such a difficult time. I don't know if I can go through this loss again. This loss has hit my husband much harder than I expected.

So I sit here listening to all of the stories with a secret of my own.

I am pregnant again for what will be the last time no matter the outcome and I cannot tell anyone, just yet.


P.S. My son was born 7 months later