+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 1 2
Results 11 to 20 of 20

Thread: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

  1. #11
    Needs a Hobby Saucy Ria will become famous soon enough Saucy Ria's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Pennsylvania
    Age
    59
    Posts
    1,237
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    I got here too late tonight to offer advice but I did want to chime in and say he would be so lucky to get to know you!! I don't envy you the waiting now though, but we'll all be here to help you get through the days it takes snail mail to get to him and for him to respond. You rock baby and we love you!!

    "Fluffilicious" {i love that..thank you :)}

    It is not an easy thing to live in a body you are often at war with!!! (Rosie)
    **********************************************
    http://www.myspace.com/gaelicandgarlic
    ***********************************
    Support Relay For Life.... Cuz Cancer Sux!
    ***********************************

  2. #12
    Forum Newbie Baroness OBrien is an unknown quantity at this point Baroness OBrien's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    20
    Downloads
    3
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    I also agree with the rest of the Ladies. I think you should go for it :)
    Local 69
    Madame Cum Laude
    IWG Member #1317

    Baroness of County Clare
    Baroness of All Things Bawdy & Lascivious

  3. #13
    Verbose Veteran daBaroness is a glorious beacon of light daBaroness is a glorious beacon of light daBaroness is a glorious beacon of light daBaroness is a glorious beacon of light daBaroness is a glorious beacon of light daBaroness is a glorious beacon of light daBaroness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Lenexa, KS
    Age
    63
    Posts
    3,851
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    You've done the hard part - now the ball is in his court. Kudos for your bravery and your desire. And know if he chooses not to accept this awesome opportunity - it has absolutely nothing to do with you. He's obviously a rover - he's been all over the world - sewn his seeds (literally and figuratively) and is probably quite a character.

    I know it's difficult to keep your expectations at bay, but truly - having written this letter you've taken the step you needed to take to set your heart and mind at ease. I don't know of many children who don't want to know about a missing or estranged parent - it's only natural.

    I'll just pray the man who gave you half your self wants to revel the amazing person he helped make!

    Felicitations

    Wenchin' Since the 70s

    Baroness d'Livonia, Velvette Duvet, Esther h'Ormone
    MCL #1257

    There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. ~Madeline Albright






  4. #14
    Verbose Veteran WenchLadyKate has a spectacular aura about WenchLadyKate has a spectacular aura about WenchLadyKate has a spectacular aura about WenchLadyKate's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Jersey Girl!
    Age
    43
    Posts
    5,241
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    So, it's been over 2 months. I've sent a total of 3 e-mails. I got back one that said something to the effect of he's sorry that he hasn't written me back, but things with the family have been a little hectic lately.

    So, what... I'm not family? I'm only his daughter. Oh well. His loss. Can't miss what I never had, right? So, why does it hurt so much? And why do I find myself thinking about it more and more?
    Move along, nothing to see here...










  5. #15
    Member of Local 69 Madame Chatterbox Artemisia will become famous soon enough Artemisia will become famous soon enough Artemisia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    The Triangle NC
    Posts
    2,812
    Downloads
    1
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    You're going through a grieving process. That's why it hurts so much. Same thing happened to me after I found out two years ago where my father lived (he left when I was 3) and was able to contact him. He has his own family but it still hurt because how can he not acknowledge me as his first born? But I say what you say - his loss.

    But loss hurts.

    Continued reiki healing heading your way, dear Sister.

    Artemisia Moltabocca
    The Pocket Pirate with new Arte Tossin' action - fun for the whole shire!
    PARF puts the f-u in fun!
    The Sisterhood of the Traveling IWG T-Shirt
    Jack the Flying Monkey
    Diary of a Renaissance Seamstress
    Reiki distance healing always headed your way.

  6. #16
    Member of Local 13 Needs a Hobby RaevynCait has a spectacular aura about RaevynCait has a spectacular aura about RaevynCait's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    *****SCARBY*****
    Posts
    1,322
    Downloads
    6
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    I'm sorry it's not turning out positively for you. It IS his loss, because you are a wonderful and fun person.
    My father got the heck out of the state before the ink was dry on the divorce papers and largely ignored all of us until the youngest was killed in an accident, and for awhile he made a token effort (with us girls, anyway), but eventually stopped making any effort with us (though he's still involved with our brother's family). It bothered me some, for awhile, but I finally realized that it was nothing I had done, it is all on him, I'd made all the effort I was going to.
    Maybe someday he will decide that you should get the chance to at least know your half siblings, but in the mean time, know that you are loved by lots of folks! , and we are blessed to know you!

    Quote Originally Posted by WenchLadyKate View Post
    So, it's been over 2 months. I've sent a total of 3 e-mails. I got back one that said something to the effect of he's sorry that he hasn't written me back, but things with the family have been a little hectic lately.

    So, what... I'm not family? I'm only his daughter. Oh well. His loss. Can't miss what I never had, right? So, why does it hurt so much? And why do I find myself thinking about it more and more?
    Raevyn

    IWG 3450
    Lady Evyl Squiggle MacGiggle
    Wench at Large #2 (So Sayeth the Countess), CW #21
    PipeWench
    b00bEnabler to the Canadian
    Sunblock Nazi
    Center of all Evil

    15.1% FaireFolk pure (84.9% FaireFolk corrupt).

    "My darling girl, when are you going to understand that 'normal' isn't a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage." ---Practical Magic
    Love is like paint,...it makes things beautiful when you spread it, ...but it will dry up if you don't use it--- Fortune Cookie

  7. #17
    Member of Local 35 Forum Freak Mistress Tafra is on a distinguished road Mistress Tafra's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Larkspur, CO
    Age
    54
    Posts
    62
    Downloads
    2
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    I'm sorry, you deserve so much better. Try to recognize that it's him, not you. Not you in anyway. From what I see of you here, he's really missing out getting to know you.

    So, maybe you can see that it's him and not you, but you still have questions...maybe you can write up your questions and interview him, kind matter of fact like. You can meet him for a coffee and ask away - surely he'd be able to find some time for some coffee? He's only 20 miles afterall. You can even email him questions in advance to give him a heads up (or not - I probably wouldn't). Some questions you may have on your heritage, medical history and maybe even family traditions only he can answer, and you should be entitled to that.

    Your siblings may very well be happy to know their sister more. Can you contact them in anyway? I so love my brother who's my father's son, and I didn't get a chance to know him until I was an adult.

    hugs
    IWG #3483

  8. #18
    Madame Chatterbox Gemdrite is a name known to all Gemdrite is a name known to all Gemdrite is a name known to all Gemdrite is a name known to all Gemdrite is a name known to all Gemdrite is a name known to all Gemdrite's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    At my computer...
    Posts
    2,795
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    It's possible he may be feeling guilty too, and putting off writing to you because of that guilt. Personally, if he was only 20 miles away, I'd probably make the effort to try and see him and talk to him, nervewracking as it would be, because a person is harder to ignore than a letter. Then, if he still wasn't interested, you are right there to at least get information about your siblings. Just because your dad might not want to get to know you doesn't mean they don't.
    "For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible." - Stuart Chase

    "What is faith? Is it to believe that which is evident? No. It is perfectly evident to my mind that there exists a necessary, eternal, supreme, and intelligent being. This is no matter of faith, but of reason." -Voltaire

    Independent Scentsy Consultant - Scentsy Wickless Candles - https://gemdrite.scentsy.us/

  9. #19
    Member of Local 69 Needs a Hobby BronxGirl will become famous soon enough BronxGirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    guess
    Posts
    1,428
    Downloads
    0
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    I know some good Irish bars in Pearl River. Wanna stalk him?


    The Guild of Saint Elizabeth I, Gloriana!

    BarKeep for the
    Good Ship Sea Goddess
    Cougar Wench #5
    Landshark #5 Royal Order of Landsharks
    Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come. -- Matt Groening, "Life in Hell"
    SO SAY WE ALL
    FINS UP
    I DO WEIRD THINGS

    Take my love, take my land,
    Take me where I cannot stand.
    I don't care. I'm still free.
    You can't take the sky from me.

    . . . then Buffy staked Edward. The end.

    (\__/)
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")
    This is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.


    Gráinia ní Mháile
    High Knitter of Undercity








  10. #20
    Member of Local 24 Gifted with Gab mstarfire has a spectacular aura about mstarfire has a spectacular aura about mstarfire's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Out of my mind, Massachusetts
    Posts
    514
    Downloads
    2
    Uploads
    0

    Default Re: Not really in distress, I just want a little advice.

    Devil's Advocate of a sort.....
    I was recently going through a rough time with personal stuff, including family problems. During that time I took a break from dating because I didn't think it was fair to start to try to build a relationship with someone - especially one that could be important - with so much negative stuff going on around me. It's just not fair to the other person.

    Allow for a bit of that to be seen in his note.

    You ARE part of his family, but you have not been an active part - no fault of yours, maybe no fault of his either. He may be having problems with the part of family that is active and close. He has a right and an obligation to care for those issues and people first. Don't take that he is taking care of those situations first as personal. It has nothing to do with you. I know I always address 'crisis' situations first.

    Take Heart. There is still potential. Give him support and time in his current situation to take care of his crisis as he needs to.

    He may also be concerned about your motivation - regardless of what you've stated - in contacting him at this time. Obviously you want something from him - what? You may have an idea of the answer, he doesn't. There are very few "unconditional relationships". What could he be feeling? Worrying?

    And if it doesn't come to pass, you have made a good effort. Make peace and let go. Go on and Grow on with your own life.
    Starfire
    AKA Maire Ni Suileabhain
    IWG #2358 Madam Cum Laude
    Local 24 & 42 - I'm the dyslexic wench
    93.4% FaireFolk Corrupt - Go me!
    Renn Vet, Merc #655, Bard #401, Nefarious #9
    Official Purveyor of Evil Comfy Slippers - Because Evil Knows Comfy (See Chair)


    Lead me not into Temptation.... I give guided tours!

    Cleavagenous- (not yet in dictionary - lets see what we can do) adj.-to have an abundance of cleavage

+ Reply to Thread

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

     

Similar Threads

  1. I need advice on boy problems...
    By LissaRoisin in forum Damsels in Distress
    Replies: 42
    Last Post: 02-17-2007, 10:25 PM
  2. Not distress, actually....
    By Phoenix McHeit in forum Damsels in Distress
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 09-11-2006, 08:42 PM
  3. advice of the elders
    By Galleywench in forum A Hussies Hangout
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 03-09-2005, 10:26 AM
  4. Advice for a Career Confused Gal
    By keira strongbow in forum A Hussies Hangout
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 06-19-2004, 09:33 AM
  5. BBC Gardening advice
    By Nevada in forum A Hussies Hangout
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 02-09-2004, 10:37 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts