ok, I have long suspected that a spider (specifically Brown recluse) is one of my totems. I feel a little backstory is in order.
When I was 6, I was bitten and was nearly blinded in my left eye (bite on lower eyelid).
I was bitten on the ankle when I was 19.
in 2003 two weeks before TRF started, I dreamed that I was at faire and forgot to check my boots before putting them on and got bit again, when I called my parents the next day I found out my dad had been bitten and was in the hospital (complications due to also being diabetic)
was bitten on my leg by an ordinary spider at Trf in Nov, had an allergic reaction (pain swelling fever headache) that bite healed really quickly and thanksgiving weekend I was bitten in the same spot, this time again by a brown recluse.
All three previous bites, the squashed spider was available for confirmation. . . (yes I know how unlikely my story is from a medical standpoint)
Last week I woke up to go to work and there was a swollen white, itchy blister on the side of my left breast. I couldn't find a spider. . .but I think I know what the bites look and feel like by now.
I feel like someone or something is trying desperately to get my attention. . .but I keep missing it. I want to know what it is I'm missing here. I'm familiar with most traditional connotations of spiders. . . but nothing seems to jump out at me. If anyone has any suggestions or insights into this matter, they would be greatly appreciated:)
Oh btw we also have a HUGE spider with a really spectacular web living in one corner of our living room. We've let it stay there because neither I nor my SO knows how to safely relocate it and neither of us wants to kill it either.